How to Be an American Housewife by Margaret Dilloway

Despite it's title, How to Be an American Housewife will not give its readers advice on American domesticity.  It is, however, loosely inspired by a book entitled The American Way of Housekeeping, which informs newly-married Japanese women how to "keep house the 'American way'" (276).  Margaret Dilloway also found inspiration in her own mother, a Japanese immigrant, who felt she had enough life stories "to make a great book" (276).  How to Be an American Housewife is a candid look into the lives of a mother and a daughter and how they each assimilate into a culture different  from her own.

After marrying an American serviceman shortly after WWII, Shoko moves from her native Japan to San Diego with her new husband and begins a life which is culturally, linguistically, and religiously different from the one to which she is accustomed.  Her abilities to raise a family, clean her home, interact with people and communicate with them are all challenged as she vollies between Japanese and American lifestyles and beliefs.

Shoko's daughter Sue may have recognized her mother's differences from those of her friends' parents during her childhood, but she did not always understand them.  When Shoko's health issues become grave, Sue agrees to fly to Japan with her own daughter in search of her mother's estranged brother Taro.  As Sue absorbs Japan and its rich history and becomes acquainted with Taro, she begins to understand the difficulties Shoko has undergone to assimilate herself into American culture.

How to Be an American Housewife was just an okay read for me.  I enjoyed the book while reading it, but the characters and plot did not leave any lasting impressions upon me.  I don't feel like I connected with the characters on a personal level; although, I could appreciate their struggles for societal acceptance and desires to reconnect with estranged family.  Somehow, somewhere I was looking for more out of these characters.  However, I have yet to put my finger on what that is exactly.  Maybe I was looking for Charlie, Shoko's husband, to stand up and take a more active role in the situations in which they had been confronted.  Or maybe I felt like the ending was too comfortable and reliable for this type of a plot.

What I did enjoy about the book was its unique look into Japanese culture and how it compares and/or differs from American culture.  Specific nuiances and subtleties such as looking someone in the eye when being spoken to, flooding your son with gifts and praise, and leaving food on your plate when you are done eating all affect one's interpretation of the situation.  This may not have been one of my favorite books of all time, but it did provide me with a lesson into Japanese culture.

Other books to note regarding Japanese culture:
     *  Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden